Help for Spouses of Addicts: 7 Ways to Help Your Spouse

help for spouses of addicts
get the girl you love

 

Kofi’s wife is addicted to smoking marijuana and sniffing cocaine and he wants to know how he should manage the situation, as well as what he can do to help his wife overcome the habit.

“When I met her, she was a sweet, humble, loving woman and we had some great times. However, after we got married, she fell into bad company and started taking drugs. I know there is help for spouses of addicts to help them relate to their spouses in ways that can help them to make a positive change in their better-halves. I would appreciate it if I could get some tips to help me deal with the situation because I still love her and I don’t want to divorce her,” Kofi says, with a sad look on his face.

And there is help for spouses of addicts as Kofi indicated. In this article, I want to give you some of that help to help you cope if your wife is taking drugs.

So, what are some of the things you can do?

 

1.     Remind Yourself Of Your Wedding Vows

Recall the vows you made when you tied the knot and the promises you made to each other to love one another in sickness and in health. Write what you can remember of the vows in your diary or journal and read them often to yourself. It will increase the likelihood that you will be committed to helping your spouse overcome her habit: you are likely to feel a sense of obligation and that can increase the chances that you will support and encourage your spouse to make choices that will help her to beat the habit.

 

2.     Avoid Criticizing Your Spouse Too Often

Do not grumble and complain about the behavior of your wife or else she may get depressed. Consequently, she may have an excuse to indulge in the habit and so her situation may get worse. Additionally, avoid acting as though you are holy and she is a “dirty” person. Doing that will hurt her feelings and she may seek solace in taking drugs to drown her emotional pain, and that will make it difficult for you to convince her to seek professional help.

Rather, give your spouse emotional support and make her feel that you are a friend. It will make her feel loved and she may consider what she is doing to the marriage, and the ways she is messing up her life, and that can instigate her to reconsider her habit, which may be the turning point in her life: she may make a decision to do something about her addiction and that may increase the likelihood that she may seriously consider seeing a therapist.

Furthermore, supporting your wife and letting her know that despite her addiction you still love her, cherish her, and want the best for her will help her to overcome the shame she may be feeling as a result of what the habit may be doing to her. Consequently, she will start sharing fears and worries with you and that will give you an opportunity to make her realize how bad her habit is affecting your relationship, and the need to see a professional.

 

3.     Let Your Spouse Know That She Can Always Talk To You

Make your spouse understand that whenever she feels worried about her addiction, or when she needs someone to talk to, or when she feels afraid, she can always turn to you because you will listen. It will help to prevent a situation where she may turn to friends she takes drugs with, or friends who influenced her to start the habit in the first place and who will give her bad advice that can help to perpetuate the habit. When she knows you will listen and not judge her, she will come to you often and as she feels that the emotional connection is still there, chances are that you can convince her to seek help.

 

4.     Do Not Give Her Unsolicited Advice

Do your best to avoid lecturing her or preaching to her about her habit. When you do that, she may feel that you are judging her and that can help to breed resentment in her heart because she may feel that you think you are better than her. So, she may not connect with you so that you can influence her to stop the habit: she may start to distance herself emotionally and she may spend more time with the people who influence her to take the drugs.

 

5.     Remain Calm When You Are Talking To Her

You can become charged with negative emotions sometimes when you are communicating with your wife because she may say things under the influence of the drugs that will anger you. However, avoid shouting or screaming at her when she annoys you or when she tries to start an argument. To help you do that, remind yourself of the times when she was great to you, when she showed a lot of love to you and made you happy, and it will make you have empathy for her.

 

6.     Improve Your Emotional Intelligence

There are several benefits you can get when you work on your emotional intelligence, including the fact that it will help you empathize better with your wife. Consequently, you will avoid behaviors that will trigger fights, your wife will feel more comfortable to relate to you, and that can increase the likelihood that she will listen to you when you advice her to go to a rehab center.

You can use some of these tips to enhance your emotional intelligence.

 

7.     Let Her Spend Company With Women Who Have Also Kicked The Habit

Invite women who have also been addicted to drugs before , but who have successfully kicked the habit, and who are now living happy, fruitful lives, to your house often so that they can establish a friendship with your wife.

When they share their stories with your wife and let her see that taking drugs messes someone up, and

when they share how their lives have been transformed since they stopped taking drugs, and how they are enjoying life now, it is likely to make an impression on your wife and she may seriously reconsider what she is doing to herself.

 

Conclusion

In this article about help for spouses of drugs addicts, I have given you tips that can help you to relate well to your wife so that you can get her to change her behavior. Run with these tips and you are likely to see positive changes in the life of your wife, as well as in the marriage.

 

You Might Also Like To Read:

How To Cope With Your Girlfriend If She Is An Alcoholic

Strategies You Can Use To Get Your Alcoholic Or Drug Addicted Girlfriend To Seek Professional Help

How To Help Your Girlfriend When She Has A Panic Attack

How To Deal With Anxious Attachment

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright ©2018 All rights reserved Christian Dating Advice for Men

 

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6 Excellent Ways to Start Talking to Someone On a Dating Site

how to start talking to someone on a dating site
how to start talking to someone on a dating site

 

Kwabena Sakyi has recently completed his profile on one of the free online dating sites on the internet and he wants to know how he can engage a woman he wants to date. “I want to know how I can start talking to someone on a dating site: I have seen this gorgeous woman  and I don’t want to botch things up by saying  the wrong things or giving her a wrong impression of who I am. What should I say when I send her the first message? What should I write so that I can grab her attention?” Kwabena asks, with a smile on his face.

In this article, I want to show you some of the things you must say when you start talking to someone on a dating site so that he or she will become interested in you.

These are the secrets.

1.     Start With Something Very Simple

Start by sending the woman a very short message. In this message, ask her how she is doing so that she will reckon that you are a caring guy and that can increase the likelihood that she will want to be your friend.

So, you may write something such as, “Hello, sweetheart! How is life treating you?” or “Hi! What are you doing at the moment?” or “What’s up?” or “Want to chat?”: they are all good ways you can start talking to someone on a dating site.

Starting this way will help you to get rid of your nerves, if you feel nervous. Additionally, it will make it easy for her to read the message, as well as captivate her, and she may decide to find out who this guy is who gathered courage to send her a message.

 

2.     Let Her See That You Are An Intriguing Guy

After she responds, show her that you are a creative guy. It will make her feel that you can come up with different ideas to maintain fun and excitement in the friendship and that may motivate her to respond to your message so that she can have an enthralling life.

So, you may write something such as this, “Ever ridden on the back of crocodiles before? I imagine that is beyond your wildest dreams! But I have done it a number of times at the Paga crocodile pond. I sat on a crocodile for 5 minutes. And I can assure you it’s no joke! And that’s not all. I visited the Mole National Park and went hunting in the dead of the night. It was so eerie. And guess where I am off to next week?”

 

3.     Praise Her

Every woman wants to be praised by a man and you will receive a thumbs up from her if you say something nice about her profile photo, or if you say something nice about what she has written in her profile.

So, scrutinize her photo and say something that will make her feel that you like her. For example, if she uploads a picture in which she is sitting in her room, you may write something such as this, “I see your room is very well kept. I believe you are a very neat and organized woman. That is the kind of woman I like to hang out with. Keep it up.”

If you like the dress she is wearing, you may say something such as this, “That dress you were wearing when you took that picture is first class. And I must say it looks great on you. You should consider wearing it often for it really makes you look attractive.”

 

4.     Look  For Common Ground

Carefully browse the woman’s profile description and look for interests that both of you share. This can  help you to catch her attention quickly because you will be able to raise a topic for discussion that she may be passionate about. And when you send her a question that asks about something that she likes doing, she will feel that she is likely to engage in exciting conversations with you since both of you will find it easy to be on the same page: she will feel that you can build rapport quickly, and that may influence her to respond to your message.

So, for example, if after going through her profile you see that she loves soccer, and you also love soccer, you may ask her a question such as, “I have been arguing with guys about this: was Pele a better footballer than Maradona, or is Cristiano Ronaldo a better footballer than Lionel Messi? I want to know your views.” Asking her a question based on your common interests will start an interesting interaction which will help both of you to bond.

5.  Ask Her  A Personal Question

Studies have shown that when one makes people talk about themselves, it makes them like you. Therefore, if you can make the woman share something personal about her life with you, she will feel a connection and that can increase the chances that she may start a relationship with you.

So, you may ask her things such as, “What is the funniest thing you did when you were in junior high school?” or “Tell me about your brothers,” or “What is the most embarrassing thing that has happened to you since you were born?” or “What do you normally do when you close from work?” or “How do you spend your weekends?”

 

6.     Show That You Have A Sense Of Humor

Research has shown that women like guys who can make them laugh: when you exhibit a sense of humor, it will tell the woman that you can entertain her and make her forget about some of her worries and she will be curious to know more about to you.

So, craft a nice joke and deliver it to her and she will stop for a moment and say to herself, “This guy seems interesting. Let me see where this can lead to.”

 

Conclusion

This is how to start talking to someone on a dating site: keep it simple at first. And then try to come across as a fun-loving guy, praise her, elicit personal information from her, and let her see that you have a good sense of humor.

 

You Might Also Like To Read:

How To Find Love Online

Finding Love On A Dating Site

Tinder Profile Tips For Men

Dating Profile Examples 1

Dating Profile Examples 2

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright ©2018 All rights reserved Christian Dating Advice for Men

 

Incorporate Me Deeper Into Your Heart: Awesome Ways to Create a Great Relationship

incorporate me
incorporate me

 

Yaw Manu has been in a relationship with Yaa Amponsah for six months now and Yaa feels that their relationship is not strong enough. “Yaa has been saying to me often, ‘Incorporate me deeper into your life so that we can have a fantastic relationship.’ I love Yaa very much and she loves me too and we want this relationship to continue until we marry.  I know that there are areas we can improve upon and we have begun working on those areas. However, I need more ideas to help us have a strong relationship. I want to know things I can do so that my girlfriend can also incorporate me deeper into her heart. I would be happy if you could help me in this regard,” Yaw requests.

If you also feel that there is a lot of room for improvement in your romantic relationship, then here are some things you can do to create a great relationship.

 

1.     Remind Yourself Of The Early Days Of The Relationship Often

Talk about what you used to do when you first started dating, and how you related to each other then, and some of the things you did that helped to maintain the love in your relationship. Then, start doing some of those things again. It will help to rejuvenate the love you feel for each other and you will bond better and stronger.

 

2.     Show Gratitude To Your Girlfriend Every Day

A study has revealed that when lovers show gratitude, it can make the lovers feel strongly bonded to each other. Additionally, appreciating your partner will make him or her feel satisfied to be in the relationship.

So, when you appreciate the sacrifices that your girlfriend makes to make you happy, it will make her feel happy and she will be willing to do more to enhance the quality of the relationship.

Furthermore, when you let her know that what she is doing for you touches your heart and makes you have stronger feelings for her, she will see that you care about her and she is more likely to also develop deeper affection for you.

So, thank her when sacrifices her credit to call you. Thank her when she spends quality time with you engaging you in exciting conversation. Thank her when she nurses you during sickness, and let her know that you appreciate it when she tells you she loves you.

 

3.     Practice Active Listening

Good communication is essential for the stability of any romantic relationship: when you can express yourself well and get your girlfriend to understand the messages that you want to convey, you will find it easier to address differences and resolve conflicts and that will help both of you to maintain the stability of your relationship.

One aspect of communication you must take seriously is active listening. How do you do that?

  • Do your best to be sensitive to what she says to you, instead of ignoring her concerns and the issues she may have about the way you are treating her, or instead of ignoring the changes she wants you to make in the way you relate to her so that the relationship can become stronger.
  • Additionally, when you have conversations, let your girlfriend know that you are following what she is saying by asking her to clarify certain points, asking her questions based on what she said to you, looking into her face, nodding when she says something you appreciate, and shaking your head when she says something that you disagree with.

Listening to her actively will make her feel that you value her opinions and her concerns and that can help her maintain the love she has for you.

 

4.     Be Kind To Your Partner

When you show kindness to your girlfriend, she will feel wanted and that will make her feel happy, which will increase the likelihood that she will be emotionally stable. When her emotions are in a state of equilibrium, she is more likely to relate to you lovingly and that can help to enhance the connection between the two of you.

So, avoid criticizing her unfairly or condemning her when she makes mistakes. Rather, focus on her positives, remind yourself of the things she does right in the relationship, and let that help you to treat her with respect and honor.

 

5.     Show Humility At All Times

A study has revealed that humility can help to make a relationship last for a long time. When you choose to be humble, you will find it easier to say to your girlfriend, “What you did hurt me, but because I love you so much, and for the sake of our relationship, I forgive you.”

Additionally, when you choose to be humble, you are more likely to sacrifice your comfort to make her feel happy in the relationship. Consequently, she is more likely to be pleased with the way you treat her, she may reciprocate by treating you with respect and honor, and that can help to solidify your relationship.

So, show humility. How can you do that?

  • Remind yourself often that there are things she can do better than you. Moreover, remind yourself often that there are things which you need her to do for you. When you remind yourself of your limitations this way, you will be more willing to learn from her and that will make it easier for you to control your ego.
  • Admit your mistakes when you make them. And learn to apologize to her when you see that you have erred.
  • Learn not to take things she does which you are not comfortable with too seriously all the time. Learn to laugh at yourself and some of her goofs sometimes because it will help you to control your pride, as well as help you to resist the urge to retaliate when she says or does something you dislike.

 

6.     Be Quick To Forgive Your Girlfriend When She Hurts You

When you forgive your girlfriend, when you choose to release bitterness, you will find it easier to relate to her with respect and that can help both of you to resolve conflicts amicably. Resolving differences in a peaceful manner will help to maintain the stability and integrity of the relationship.

Additionally, when you learn to forgive, you will not engage in shouting matches with her when you have disagreements. Consequently,  tempers may not rise to the point where both of you will feel very bitter towards each other, and that will make it easier  for you to discuss your differences and solve them in a spirit of understanding.

 

 

Conclusion

Your partner may say to you sometimes, “Incorporate me deeper into your life so that we can have a great relationship.” To do that, remind each other of the early days of your relationship and try to relive those days, thank your girlfriend for what she does for you, listen to her concerns with an empathetic ear, show kindness to her, do your best to be humble, and forgive her from your heart when she wrongs you.

 

You Might Also Like To Read:

How To Cope With Your Girlfriend If She Is An Alcoholic

How To Be Patient With Your Girlfriend

How To Become More Patient Towards Your Girlfriend

How To Humble Yourself In Your Relationship

How To Help Your Girlfriend If She Is A Drug Addict

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright ©2018 All rights reserved Christian Dating Advice for Men

 

 

Focus On The Family: 6 Smart Ways To Deal With Divorce

focus on the family
focus on the family: ask for the support of family members

 

Kofi Amponsah has just gone through a bitter divorce and he is filled with thoughts of revenge and bitterness and he wants to know how he can deal with the pain and bitterness.

“I did my best to focus on the family. I did my best to love Ashorkor with all my heart! And that is why I paid her school fees to help her get through college, and that is why I bought gifts for her and our two kids often. I sacrificed other interests so that I could spend quality time with the family on weekends. However, she chose to pay me back by cheating on me. I confronted her and informed her family about her infidelity when I found out she was having an affair and she admitted she was cheating. I was prepared to try to work things out, but she asked for a divorce because she said I had disgraced her. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what will happen to the kids. I am very hurt. After all that I invested in her, she chose to divorce me! I want to know how I can deal with the pain in my heart,” Kofi says, with an angry look on his face.

A divorce can cause emotional turmoil and also cause bad blood between two former lovers. In extreme cases, some men go to the extent of physically harming their exes out of pain and anger.

In this article, I want to focus on the family and look at how a man can deal with the pain of a divorce in healthy ways so that he will not do harm to himself or others.

Ready to roll? Here we go…

 

1.     Write Your Feelings Down In Your Journal

Journaling is a good way to deal with divorce. It will help you to clear your mind and that can help you to figure out what you will do next, and how you will manage yourself so that you can cope with your new situation.

  • So, write down 10 of the most horrible thoughts that come into your mind about your former husband or former wife and which make you feel like doing something to hurt them back.
  • Write down how you feel every two hours during a day so that you can keep track of your emotional changes. It can help you to take immediate remedial measures when you feel extremely negative, such as phoning a friend or relative for a chat.
  • Pen down lessons you have learned as a result of the divorce and how it has helped you to mature as an individual.
  • Write down 10 things you will do every day to occupy yourself so that you will not reminisce about what you could have done differently and what your ex should have done to make the marriage work.

 

2.     Prepare For Your New Status

When you divorce, many new responsibilities are thrust onto your shoulder which you must deal with. For example, you may have depended on your wife for money to buy clothes, shoes, and to pay the bills and you will now have to take care of those things by yourself. Or, you may have depended on your wife to cook for you, clean the house, and pay part of the bills in the house.

Therefore, you must sit down and assess ways in which you have to adjust or upgrade your skills so that you can handle the extra responsibilities that you will be faced with.

For example, if you don’t know how to cook, you may consider going for cooking classes so that you can cook homemade meals. Or, if you are poor at managing finances, you might consider educating yourself about financial issues such as how to manage your finances, ways to do profitable investments, how to save and so on.

 

3.     Try To Bring Order Back Into Your Life

When a divorce occurs, you may become so confused that you will find it difficult to follow your daily and weekly routine: you may fail to talk to close friends, you may stop watching your favorite sport, you may avoid hanging out with your male friends, or you may stop going to church.

However, you are more likely to get over the breakup faster if you do your best to live your life as close as possible to when there was order and structure in your life. This will help you to feel that you are still in control of the situation and that can make it easier for you to focus on today, and expect that possibilities may open up tomorrow, instead of mourning about the divorce.

 

4.     Set New Goals Or Your Life

It can feel intimidating when you consider that you will have to go through life without the woman who lay next to you in bed, and who would welcome you home every evening with a hug and a kiss.

To help you overcome this feeling, sit down with a pen and your diary or journal and write down goals you hope to achieve by the end of the month, at the end of three months, at the end of six months and so on. It will help you to feel that you are starting afresh and that can help to induce some excitement in you.

Furthermore, it will help you to focus firmly on the future, which will make it easier for you to forget about regrets.

 

5.     Do Volunteer Work

Volunteering is good for your mind: when you invest your time in others, when you spend time with people, you will feel connected to people again and that can help to drive loneliness and despair out of your life.

Additionally, helping others to solve their problems will help to remind you that you are a responsible man who can still solve problems and impact on the lives of others and that can help to boost your self-confidence again.

So, volunteer to help kids learn how to play soccer, take care of animals in a zoo, help a neighbor repair his car, help out at the office of your political party, spend time with lonely elderly men and keep them company, or share gospel tracts in your neighborhood or go overseas to do Evangelism.

 

6.     Focus On The Family: Seek Family Support

A study has revealed that social support can help one to deal with stress. When you talk to members of your family or friends, the pain of the divorce will lessen as you share the pain in your heart and as you talk about your fears, and worries about the future, and your concerns about the kids.

So, keep constant contact with your family members and let them know how you feel at every stage of this tough journey.

 

Conclusion

In this article about focus on the family: how to deal with a divorce, I have shown you that journaling, preparing for new responsibilities that you will have to take up, doing your best to maintain order, setting new goals for your life, helping others, and seeking solace in the love of your family can all help you to survive.

 

You Might Also Like To Read:

Dealing With A Depressed Girlfriend

How To Help Your Wife When She Gets Depressed After Giving Birth

How To Help Your Girlfriend If She Is A Drug Addict

How To Help Your Girlfriend When She Has A Panic Attack

Strategies You Can Use To Get Your Alcoholic Or Drug Addicted Girlfriend To Seek Professional Help

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright ©2018 All rights reserved Christian Dating Advice for Men

 

9 Intelligent Ways to Get Over Someone

how to get over someone
how to get over someone: tell yourself that it is over

 

Kwasi Tweneboah has broken up with his girlfriend recently and he wants to know how to get over someone so that you can put back some order into your life.

“Akua cheated on me and I could not forgive her. So, I called it quits. However, I think about Akua often and that disturbs me. I can’t focus on work and my supervisor has been complaining of late. Additionally, I don’t enjoy life anymore. Food tastes like sand in my mouth; I don’t enjoy playing soccer like I used to; I don’t spend time with friends because when we go out, I just make up the numbers. How do you get over someone cheating on you? The affair she had still makes me angry and sometimes I feel like revenging. And, yet, I want to stop thinking about her. How do you get over someone and stop thinking about them?” Kwasi asks.

In this article, I want to show you how to get over some and even still be friends, for you never know ,you may need the help of your ex years down the line.

So, what should you do?

 

1.     Tell Yourself That It Is Over

Even if you still have feelings for him or her and you think there is a slim chance that you may get back together again, tell yourself that you will never come back together again. This will help you to focus on your life, to focus on now so that you can reorganize yourself and look at the opportunities that are open before you (guys who are interested in you and who were praying for this breakup), and that can make it easier for you to bring back structure and order into your life.

On the other hand, if you keep hoping that he or she may come back, and they never do, you will suffer more heartache and that may crush your spirit.

 

2.     Look At How You Have Benefited Since You Broke Up With The Person

It is true that you loved the person who broke up with you and you experienced some wonderful moments when you were in a relationship with him or her. However, if you sit down for a moment and reflect, you will see that the relationship also robbed you of something, which you have gained back after you broke up with him or her: it may be that you now have enough time to study your books; it may be that you can focus on building your career now. Or, you may have the freedom and time now to visit exotic locations in your country, or around the world.

So, deliberately focus your attention on how you have benefitted, instead of making yourself miserable by reminiscing about the marvelous times you spent with your ex.

To help you do this, write down about 20 ways your life has improved since the breakup, or 10 things you can do now which you could not do when you were in the relationship with the man or woman. This exercise will make you see that you are not the miserable wretch that you may feel you are and so you should enjoy life as it comes.

 

3.        See The Positives Of The Breakup, And Not Only The Negatives

Remind yourself that nothing in this life happens just by chance and so the dissolution of the relationship will yield good results: it will make you a better person and you will meet a far better lover than the man or woman you broke up with. This will make you look forward to the future with hope in your heart, which will make it easier for you to forget about the pain of the past relationship.

You can feel that something great is going to come out of the breakup by making positive affirmations such as this one to yourself often, “Yes. The past relationship was enjoyable, but it was not the best relationship that I can ever have in this life. I can experience something far more wonderful than that relationship and I will look forward to that relationship.”

 

4.     Unfriend Your Ex From Facebook

A study published in the journal Cyberpsychology some years ago revealed that men or women who keep visiting the profile of their ex’s Facebook profile are likely to feel bitter towards their ex. Additionally, their affection for their ex is likely to be rekindled.

When you have negative feelings towards your ex, you are likely to plot revenge against him or her, or you are more likely to harbor anger in your heart. These things will make you think of him or her often, and you can never move on as a result.

However, if you remove reminders of your ex from your private space, and you avoid trying to know what is going on in his or her life, you will find it easier to think about other things and the memories of that past relationship, as well as the memory of your ex, will fade gradually over time.

 

5.     Eat Fruits And Vegetables

Fruits and vegetables release hormones that can make one feel happy, such as dopamine. These hormones will make you feel calm and relaxed. Consequently, you can focus on your life and your relationship with the people around you better.

 

6.     Exercise Every Day

Research has shown that exercising makes the brain release a group of chemicals known as endorphins which give one a “feel good” feeling. Consequently, you will feel happy every day and it will make you miss the man or woman who broke your heart less.

 

7.     Rebuild Your Self Confidence

Remind yourself that you are a great person and so you can make someone else fall in love with you. This will prevent you from thinking that no one may love you again, which will cause nostalgia and make you miss your ex.

 

8.     Participate In Research On Breakups

A study published in the journal Social Psychological and Personality Science in 2015 revealed that taking part in research on breakup can help one to get over a breakup.

Taking part in these surveys will help you to reorganize how you view yourself: you will look at all the angles of the breakup and that will make you see perspectives that you may not have considered before. As a result, you will be able to come to terms with the situation and that can make it easier for you to move one.

 

9.     Do Something Helpful For Others

Some studies suggest that when one donates his or her time to help alleviate the suffering of others, it can help the person to get rid of loneliness.

Additionally, connecting with people and helping them will help you to hear stories of survival and resilience, which will make you see that compared to other people, you are fortunate. Consequently, you will feel more grateful about your life and that can make you forget about the whole bad affair.

So, get out of the house and go shopping for a friend or relative. Or, teach adults a foreign language, visit a lonely student in your alma mater, mow the lawn of your neighbor, or take care of the pet of an old school mate and you will feel happy.

 

Conclusion

This is how to get over someone: face the reality and accept that you will not get back together with your ex again, remind yourself of the good things that have happened in your life since the breakup, allow yourself to see that things will work together for good, cut contact with your ex, share your experiences with others, and give your time and energy to the disadvantaged in society.

 

You Might Also Like To Read:

How To Be Patient With Your Girlfriend

How To Become More Patient Towards Your Girlfriend

How To Humble Yourself In Your Relationship

How To Deal With Anxious Attachment

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright ©2018 All rights reserved Christian Dating Advice for Men

 

First Date Tips for Men to Help You Meet A Wonderful Woman

first date tips for men
first date tips

 

 

Kojo Antwi has been able to convince a girl to go out with him and he needs first date tips. “I have been attracted to Ama for several months now. She is smart, beautiful, witty, and she has great character: she is always willing to sacrifice her comfort to make a guy feel cool. It was not easy approaching her because when I observed her from afar, and I considered her great personality, I thought she would play hard to get. It took me days of rehearsing my lines before I finally said those words. And you should have been around when she said yes: I was on cloud nine. However, immediately after, I was filled with fear that I may not be able to make a good impression on her. I want her to have such a great first date that I will find it easy to make her go out with me again and again until we can have a relationship. What do I do during our date? What attitude should I adopt? How should I behave?” Kojo asks in a nervous voice.

In this article, I want to give you first date tips to help you make that night a wonderful one so that the woman will wish to go out with you again.

 

1.     Make Up Your Mind That You Will Enjoy Yourself

Psyche yourself and adopt a mindset that says that you will do your best to enjoy yourself and make your date have a rollicking time. This will help you not to feel so apprehensive about the adventure. Consequently, you will find it easier to be yourself during the date. And that can increase the likelihood that you will engage in stimulating conversation to make the woman happy.

 

2.     What To Wear

What you choose to wear should be informed by your motive for dating the woman. For example, if you want to have a long-term relationship with her, then choose to wear something red because research shows that women find men who wear clothes of that color appealing and irresistible. You may choose to wear a red long-sleeved shirt or red T-shirt, depending on where you will have the date. And you may choose to match that with a black pair of trousers or black pair of jeans.

If you have no intention to date her long-term, then you may wear a blue shirt or suit and match it with a blue pair of trousers or a black pair of trousers. Alternatively, wear a white shirt and match it with a black pair of trousers.

Make sure that the color of your belt matches the color of your shoes. For example, if you wear a brown belt, wear brown shoes. And if you wear a black belt, wear black shoes.

 

3.     Be Intriguing

Do not make it easy for her to figure you out. Do your best to hide some of your strong points and some of your idiosyncrasies so that you can have something with which to surprise her every time you meet, if you continue dating. So, say things that will put her in a suspenseful mood and make her wish to see you again.

 

4.     Make Sure You Communicate Properly

Use simple language and simple sentences to convey your thoughts and feelings and avoid trying to impress you date with flowery language and big vocabulary. This will help your date to understand you well so that you can establish a good and strong rapport.

On the other hand too, make sure you pay complete attention to what your date says and look for nonverbal cues that tell you that she is uncomfortable or feeling bored so that you can liven things up.

  • For example, if you ask her something and she frowns or she tries to dodge the question, it should alert you that she does not want to discuss that subject.
  • Or, if she keeps looking at her watch it means she is bored and she wants you to change the direction of the discussion.
  • If she looks down often, it should tell you that she is unhappy.
  • If she looks around often, it should tell you that you are not exciting enough and you should up your game.
  • If she drums her fingers on the table or on her body, she may be irritated with something you said.

Additionally, use these listening skills to enhance your communication with your date. Furthermore, ask interesting questions such as those here so that your date will enjoy the evening.

 

5.     Does She Like Me?

At the end of the date, you may wonder whether the lady likes you so that you can ask her to go out with you again. How can you know that? Check out if she mimics some of your gestures and if once in a  while she copies the way you speak: research suggests that when someone mimics you, it means there is a likelihood that the person likes you.

So, if you see that she mimics your accent during the conversation, copies the way you throw your hands about, or makes some of the facial expressions that you make, it is likely that she has enjoyed your company and you should feel confident to ask her to go out with you again.

 

6.     Make Sure That She Arrives At Home Safely

Let the woman see that you care about her welfare and about her safety by ensuring that she gets home without any hitches. So, drive her back home if you picked her up. If you don’t have a car, join the bus and go home with her, or join the taxi you hire for her and ensure that she enters her house before you go home.

 

Conclusion

Some first date tips you might like to implement are that make up your mind that “I’ll have fun and make sure she enjoys the time too,” wear something red, blue, or black to make you look attractive, speak in simple, clear language and listen attentively, and take her home after the date.

 

You Might Also Like To Read:

Signs A Woman Is Attracted To You

How To Find Love

Dating 101 Tips To Make A Woman Like You

Dating 101 Tips For Men And Women

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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2 Great Tinder Profile Tips for Men to Help You Find Love

tinder profile tips
Tinder profile tips for men: tell interesting stories

 

Online dating is helping people to find love and spouses. And one person who also wants to use this medium to find a mate is Kwame Oduro. Kwame is 30 years old, he has dated a number of women face- to- face, but all those relationships ended on rocks. He is desperate to settle down and start a family, but his busy schedule lately makes it difficult for him to go out nowadays to find women.

“Some friends have suggested that I use online dating to find a woman because it will afford me the opportunity to meet a lot more women than I could if I went around looking for a woman. I believe it will also make it easy for me to interact with women considering my tight schedules. I am a bit skeptical about online dating, but I will take the risk and give it a try. Some friends have indicated that tinder is a good place to start. I want to set up a great tinder profile to help me attract the kind of woman that I can have a good relationship with. I would be happy if you could give me some tinder profile tips to help me enable me to look appealing to women who will visit my profile,” Kwame says.

If you are also interested in dating on tinder, then here are some tips that will help you to get responses from women so that you can start a friendship and build it up until you both fall in love.

 

1.     Upload A Picture In Which You Are Doing Something Exciting Such As Playing A Guitar

Research suggests that when a man uploads a profile picture in which he looks active, instead of showing one in which he is just standing in front of his house, sitting drinking, sleeping in his bed, sitting at his desk in the office, or standing with friends, he is more likely to get responses from women.

When you show a picture in which you are engaging in something interesting, women who visit your profile will reckon that you live an exciting, engaging life and that will make some of them contact you so that they can also experience that fun-filled life.

Additionally, you will make it easier for women who also love music and singing to contact you and start a conversation with you, or to have something to talk about when you send them a first message: it will facilitate communication and that can make both of you connect quickly.

So, if you have photos about when you were learning how to play the guitar, or about when you collected your friend’s guitar, showcase them on your profile. If you don’t have any such photos, get a guitar and take some pictures with it, or borrow a guitar and let your friend take photos of you playing it!

 

2.     Let 70% Of Your Profile Be About Yourself

Some experts suggest that let 70% of the profile be about yourself and use the remaining 30% to tell women about the kind of person you think you will be compatible with, and that can increase your chances of finding love.

Doing this will help you to reveal yourself appropriately so that women who visit your profile will get to know your personality thoroughly and, as a result, you can attract women who will feel comfortable with your kind of personality.

So, for example, you may write something such as this, “Want to know how I am? Well, I stick needles into the butts of people in an effort to cure them of one disease or the other. Additionally, I diagnose what is wrong with people when they come to see me and…you get the picture? So, let’s play a little game. Guess who I am? Do you want to know what I am doing at the moment? I am sitting on a beach, drinking cool coconut water (boy oh boy , this coconut water tastes great!) and admiring beautiful women swimming in the Atlantic Ocean. Want to join me sometime? Well, this is what I normally do on weekends after hours of stress at the hospital. And later this evening, I will be at home cooking my favorite jollof rice, listening to something inspirational from Don Moen, and then I will watch an adventure movie with…Elsie. Oh no! Don’t get jealous! That is my dog, an adorable Alsatian! Okay, so that sums up the kind of guy I am. I want to meet an understanding woman who fears the Lord, but who is great fun to be with and who knows how to make a guy feel good about himself. If you are that kind of woman, send me a message and let’s connect. Who knows, we may end up as…your guess is as good as mine!”

Ensure that you make your personality stand out. Furthermore, make sure you include a number of jokes by sharing funny experiences that you have been involved in, or humorous scenes you have witnessed. Share it in the form of stories instead of just telling the jokes because research suggests that women like guys who tell them interesting stories. You may increase your attractiveness in the eyes of women when you share stories and one or two may contact you.

 

Conclusion

Some tinder profile tips you can use to increase the likelihood that you can attract a woman for a date are:  showcase a picture in which you are holding a guitar. And when you are writing your profile, choose to write 70 % about yourself, or you may use an alternative strategy of writing 80% about yourself.

 

You Might Also Like To Read:

How To Find Love Online

Finding Love On A Dating Site

How To Find Love Online   

Dating Profile Examples 1

Dating Profile Examples 2

Ways To Start A Conversation On A Dating Site

How To Start An Online Dating Conversation

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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